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The Owl
Who Was God
by
James Thurber
Once upon a starless midnight there was an owl who sat
on the branch of an oak tree. Two ground moles tried to slip quietly by,
unnoticed. "You!" said the owl. "Who?" they quavered, in
fear and astonishment, for they could not believe it was possible for anyone to
see them in that thick darkness. "You two!" said the owl. The moles
hurried away and told the other creatures of the field and forest that the owl
was the greatest and wisest of all animals because he could see in the dark and
because he could answer any question. "I’ll see about that, "said a
secretary bird, and he called on the owl one night when it was again very dark.
"How many claws am I holding up?" said the secretary bird.
"Two," said the owl, and that was right. "Can you give me
another expression for ‘that is to say’ or ‘namely’?" asked the secretary
bird. "To wit," said the owl. "Why does the lover call on his
love?" "To woo," said the owl.
The secretary
bird hastened back to the other creatures and reported that the owl indeed was
the greatest and wisest animal in the world because he could see in the dark
and because he could answer any question. "Can he see in the daytime,
too?" asked a red fox? "Yes," answered a dormouse and a French
poodle. "Can he see in the daytime, too?" All the other creatures
laughed loudly at this silly question, and they set upon the red fox and his
friends and drove them out of the region. They sent a messenger to the owl and
asked him to be their leader.
When the owl
appeared among the animals it was high noon and the sun was shining brightly.
He walked very slowly, which gave him an appearance of great dignity, and he
peered about him with large, staring eyes, which gave him an air of tremendous
importance. "He’s God!" screamed a Plymouth rock hen. And the others
took up the cry "He’s God!" So they followed him wherever he went and
when he bumped into things they began to bump into things, too. Finally he came
to a concrete highway and he started up the middle of it and all the other
creatures followed him. Presently a hawk, who was acting as outrider, observed
a truck coming toward them at fifty miles an hour, and he reported to the
secretary bird and the secretary bird reported to the owl. "There’s danger
ahead," said the secretary bird. "To wit?" said the owl. The
secretary bird told him. "Aren’t you afraid?" he asked.
"Who?" said the owl calmly, for he could not see the truck.
"He’s God!" cried all the creatures again, and they were still crying
"He’s God" when the truck hit them and ran them down. Some of the
animals were merely injured, but most of them, including the owl, were killed.
Moral: You can fool too many of the people too much of
the time.
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