The Bear Who Let It Alone
By James Thurber
In the woods of the Far
West there once lived a brown bear who could take it or let it alone. He would
go into a bar where they sold mead, a fermented drink made of honey, and he
would have just two drinks. Then he would put some money on the bar and say,
"See what the bears in the back room will have," and he would go
home. But finally he took to drinking by himself most of the day.
He would reel home at
night, kick over the umbrella stand, knock down the bridge lamps, and ram his
elbows through the windows. Then he would collapse on the floor and lie there
until he went to sleep. His wife was greatly distressed and his children were
very frightened.
At length the bear saw the
error of his ways and began to reform. In the end he became a famous teetotaler
and a persistent temperance lecturer. He would tell everybody that came to his
house about the awful effects of drink, and he would boast about how strong and
well he had become since he gave up touching the stuff. To demonstrate this, he
would stand on his head and on his hands and he would turn cartwheels in the
house, kicking over the umbrella stand, knocking down the bridge lamps, and
ramming his elbows through the windows.
Then he would lie down on
the floor, tired by his healthful exercise, and go to sleep. His wife was
greatly distressed and his children were very frightened.
Moral: You might as well
fall flat on your face as lean over too far backward.
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