Alice Cooper: "I once lost a 12ft-long boa constrictor in a hotel"
We think we share a deep connection with our pets – but do our attempts to read their minds actually say more about ourselves? Weekend invites proud owners to take our version of the famous Proust personality questionnaire on behalf of their beloved animals.
This week: Alice Cooper tells us about his three year old boa constrictor, Christopher...
Why the name Christopher?
We named him after the late actor Christopher Lee. It’s a departure from my previous snake names, such as Cobra Winfrey, Count Strangula and Julius Squeezer, but it suits him.
First impressions?
We hit it off right from the start, but then I’ve been keeping snakes for 40 years, so I’m used to them. The first time I saw one up close, I was as terrified as the next person. I was backstage at a show in Florida and a girl had a small boa constrictor on her hand. I jumped back in fright, but then realised that was exactly the reaction I wanted from my audience.
The snake is perhaps the strongest image in the world. I thought, what if I bring it on stage and sing with it wrapped around my arm? So I taught myself not to be afraid and started using the biggest ones in my shows.
What kind of snake owner are you?
A pushover. Before I got into snakes I was a dog man, and Christopher is equivalent to a lapdog. He watches football and Ghost Hunters with me in the evenings. It used to freak me out when he suddenly appeared over my shoulder, but now I just see him as being like any other pet.
His defining character trait?
He’s very affectionate. Every snake has a different personality. Some are curious, some just want to stretch out. Christopher likes to get in my face and kiss me with his tongue. I’m starting to think that my snake is gay.
What do you and Christopher have in common?
We both love being in front of an audience. My heavy metal doesn’t bother Christopher at all because snakes are pretty much deaf and blind. We’re also both great on the road – we love travelling long distances.
Before 9/11, I’d book my snakes a first-class seat next to me on aeroplanes and take them on board in a dog carrier. Now, Christopher travels with me on the tour bus in true rock-star style.
What makes him miserable?
The thought of being dropped. It terrifies him. He knows, though, that I will always hold on to him. He feels secure with me. He also hates being left in his case. He’s a social snake who likes to have the run of the place.
What irritates him most?
The smell of human adrenalin. If someone who is afraid of snakes comes near him, he can smell their fear and it puts him on the defensive.
Has he ever turned nasty?
That just wouldn’t happen. I’ve never been bitten or strangled by any of my snakes and we keep him away from anyone who is scared. When I go on stage, I try to make him look as ferocious as possible, but it doesn’t work. He starts licking me and I whisper out of the corner of my mouth: “Christopher! Look dangerous!”
Have you ever lost him on stage?
Not yet. But I did lose a former snake, Yvonne, a 12ft-long boa, in a hotel in Knoxville, Tennessee. I put her in the bath tub overnight as she loved to swim, but in the morning she had gone down the toilet.
She eventually emerged two weeks later in a different bathroom, having survived on sewer rats in the plumbing. Charley Pride, the country singer, who was staying in that particular room at the time, must have got the shock of his life.
What makes him happy?
He likes to have an electric heating pad in his case, but I’m quite wary of it as it almost killed one of my previous snakes.
We’d dropped a couple of rats into her case and some of their blood spilt on the heat pad. Being blind, she swallowed the whole device, apart from the plug that was still in the socket. The vet told us to unplug it and let her eat the whole thing as she might digest it. She didn’t.There was blood coming out of her nose, so a surgeon had to remove the pad from her stomach.
She made a full recovery and now lives in a petting zoo.
What irritates you about him?
He’s not terrifying enough. He defeats the purpose. OK, I’d rather have the affectionate snake than an angry one, but I wish he’d play along with the whole Alice Cooper act a little more.
His proudest moment?
He’s played Madison Square Garden. In fact, Christopher is probably the biggest rock-star snake in the world.
What does he mean to you?
He’s part of the band and a member of my family. My wife, Sheryl, adores him and is always carrying him around the place, and the band members fight over having him sleep in their rooms.
In another life he would be...
Christopher Lee, of course.
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